Soroban knowledgePublished 05/10/2026

My child is struggling with math – what should I do? Find where they are stuck, then help 10 minutes a day at home

Your child is slow at math, makes lots of mistakes, frowns whenever math time comes – and sometimes ends up in tears. You worry, give extra exercises, and the whole family gets worn out. We are Japanese soroban teachers working with children in Hanoi, and what we see most often is this: “bad at math” is usually one missing step in the foundation, not a child who “just isn’t a math person”.

The teacher stands nearby and watches the child write on the worksheet himself.

Short answer

Don’t rush to add more exercises. Find exactly where your child is stuck, then practice that one thing for 10 minutes a day:

Do a 5-minute check at home to see where they are stuck
Many children are stuck on the basics: number sense and the “friends of 10”
Understanding first, speed later
No comparing, no scolding, no doing it for them
Keep an eye on eyesight, hearing and sleep
See a specialist if your child stays far behind despite steady help

First: where exactly is your child struggling? A 5-minute check at home

“Bad at math” covers a lot. Two children with the same low score can be stuck in completely different places – and need different kinds of help.

Pick a moment when your child is in a good mood, don’t call it a “test”, and treat it as a game. Just watch – don’t correct or give hints:

Can they see a number at a glance? Quickly show 3 fingers, then 5, then 5 and 2. Does your child say “three”, “five”, “seven” right away, or count finger by finger?
Can they make 10? Ask “7 and what make 10?”, “What about 4?”. Do they answer straight away, or think for a long time and count?
Still counting on fingers? Give 4 + 3 and 8 + 5. Do they count one by one on their fingers, even for very small sums?
Stuck on word problems? “You have 5 candies and give 2 to your sister. How many are left?” Can they work out 5 − 2 but not tell which operation the problem needs?
Flustered when rushed? Give 10 easy sums: the first time untimed, the second time timed. With the clock running, do they make many more mistakes, get tense or give up?

Whichever question trips your child up is where you start. One specific sticking point is much easier to fix than a vague feeling that your child is “bad at math”. Below, each question is linked to a cause.

6 common reasons children struggle with math

These are the causes we see most often in free trial lessons. One child can have two or three of them at the same time.

Number sense hasn’t developed yet

Your child still counts one by one and doesn’t “see” 7 as 5 and 2. (Questions 1 and 3)

No “group of 10” yet

They don’t know the pairs that make 10, so every sum across 10 has to be counted. (Question 2)

Memorized steps, no understanding

They can solve problems like the example, but stop when the question is asked differently – common with word problems. (Question 4)

Rushed, then anxious

When children are afraid of mistakes, they calculate below their real ability. Over time that fear becomes “I hate math”. (Question 5)

Trouble staying focused

They understand the lesson but make mistakes by copying numbers wrong, skipping items or forgetting a step halfway.

Eyesight, hearing, sleep

Not seeing the board clearly, not hearing all of the teacher’s explanation, not sleeping enough – any of these can look like being “bad at math”.

The first three are about the foundation; the last three are about the conditions for learning. If the foundation has a gap, more exercises won’t help – you need to go back to the exact step that is missing.

Help for each cause: 10 minutes a day at home

Choose 1–2 activities that match where your child is stuck. Ten minutes a day, at the same time, in the same place. Keep going for at least 2 weeks before judging the results.

Number sense: “quick look” games in groups of 5
Line up beans or bottle caps in rows of 5, cover some, and ask “how many?”. The goal is for your child to say the number without counting.
Start at home
2 minutes before homework: you hold up fingers, your child says the number right away. Once they get it right without counting, move on to numbers up to 10.
Group of 10: quick-fire “friends of 10”
You say “7!”, your child says “3!”; “4!” – “6!”, for 1 minute a day. Once they answer without thinking, sums across 10 like 7 + 5 = 7 + 3 + 2 become much easier. The full sequence is in our article on teaching fast mental math in grade 1.
Understanding first: use real objects and let your child explain out loud
For word problems, put real candies or chopsticks on the table and act out the story. Then let your child explain how they solved it. Two good questions work better than five minutes of explaining.
Start at home
Instead of “wrong, do it again”, ask “how did you do it?”. While explaining, children often spot their own mistake.
Less fear: accuracy first, speed later
Put the clock away for a while. Choose problems easy enough that your child gets almost all of them right, then make them harder step by step. Only compare your child with themselves yesterday.
Focus: short blocks, a clear desk
Split the 10 minutes into two 5-minute blocks, with just one worksheet and one pencil on the desk. See also 8 ways to build a child’s focus.
The body: eyesight, hearing, sleep
Have your child’s eyes and hearing checked if they often squint, lean very close to their notebook or keep asking you to repeat things. Keep a regular bedtime and avoid screens right before study time.

Need practice material? Our free worksheets have a box for your child to record their own time. Once your child is confident, try online mental math practice with 1-digit numbers.

4 things not to do when your child struggles with math

All of these come from love and worry – but they usually make things harder.

Adding more exercises and longer study time. If the foundation still has a gap, more exercises just mean more mistakes. A few problems, aimed at the right spot, every day work better.
Comparing your child with siblings or friends. “They can do it, so why can’t you?” doesn’t teach your child how to do it – it only teaches them that they are not good enough.
Scolding or punishing mistakes. A frightened child finds it hard to think, and will look for ways to avoid math time instead of trying.
Giving the answer or doing it for them to save time. The homework gets finished, but your child learns nothing. Ask one hint question, then wait.

For a child who is afraid of math, getting back the feeling “I can do this” matters more than any score.

When should you see a specialist?

Most children who “struggle with math” improve once they get help in the right place. But there are cases where parents shouldn’t try to handle it alone.

Consider talking to a specialist when

your child is clearly far behind classmates and has made little progress despite months of steady help; still finds it hard to say which of two small numbers is bigger (such as 5 and 8) after a long period of practice; also struggles with reading, remembering or focusing; or is so anxious that they get stomachaches or cry every time math comes up. See a pediatrician or a child psychologist or educational specialist for a proper assessment.

These signs do not mean something is definitely wrong. Only a qualified professional who meets your child in person can make an assessment – this article and soroban teachers cannot replace that.

Which children is soroban right for – and not right for yet?

As soroban teachers, we’ll be honest: the abacus is not a cure for every math difficulty.

Soroban fits when

Your child still counts on fingers and doesn’t “see” numbers
Your child gets answers right but slowly
Your child is afraid of numbers and needs to see step-by-step progress
Your child needs good study habits

Not yet when

Your child can’t count to 10 or tell digits apart yet
The main difficulty is understanding word problems
Your child shows the signs above – see a specialist first
Your child’s schedule of extra classes is already full

The abacus gives children a concrete picture of groups of 5 and 10 – exactly the foundation many children who “struggle with math” are missing. But it takes time: 2-digit mental math usually comes by the end of Level 0 (16 lessons), together with practice at home. Read more: is learning soroban good for children?

Four smiling children next to a large soroban.

At Kodomo Soroban Center in Vinhomes Gardenia, each class has only 3–5 children, so the teacher can catch every small mistake. Each 60-minute lesson follows a fixed rhythm – greeting, grid calculations, soroban, mental math, Flash Anzan, tidying up – and mental math starts in the 4th lesson with small numbers.

See what a lesson looks like, or call/Zalo 096.802.8484 to book a free trial lesson.

Frequently asked questions

What should I do if my child is bad at math?

First find exactly where your child is stuck: number sense, the “friends of 10” pairs, word problems, or anxiety when rushed. Then practice that one thing for 10 minutes a day for at least 2 weeks – without comparing, scolding or doing it for them.

Why is my child slow at mental math?

Usually because they still count one by one instead of seeing numbers in groups of 5, don’t know the “friends of 10” pairs yet, or calculate by reciting in their head instead of using images. All three can be practiced at home if you follow the right order and practice a little every day.

What can I do if my child is afraid of math?

Take away the clock and the pressure for speed for a while, choose problems easy enough that your child gets almost all of them right, and then make them harder step by step. Don’t compare your child with others or scold mistakes. Once they get back the feeling “I can do this”, the fear usually fades. If your child gets stomachaches or cries every time they study, talk to a specialist.

Is a child who is slow at math less intelligent?

Usually not. Many children are slow at math simply because one step in the foundation is missing, because they are afraid of mistakes, because they find it hard to focus, or because of eyesight, hearing or sleep. If your child stays far behind and doesn’t improve despite months of steady help, see a pediatrician or a child psychologist or educational specialist for a proper assessment.

Does learning soroban help children do better in math?

Soroban helps most when a child still counts on fingers, gets answers right but slowly, or is afraid of numbers, because the abacus gives a concrete picture of groups of 5 and 10. It does not replace practice in understanding word problems, and it takes time, together with practice at home.

Try a free soroban lesson

Classes of 3–5 children at Vinhomes Gardenia (Hanoi), 60 minutes each, taught exactly as in Japan. Phone · Zalo 096.802.8484.

Book a free trial

Kodomo Soroban Center – teaching team

Written by the teaching team of Kodomo Soroban Center, following the method and textbooks of Kodomo School (Japan, teaching soroban since 1976). The center is licensed by the Hanoi Department of Education and Training, and our project is a 2026 EDU-Port Nippon supported project of Japan’s Ministry of Education (MEXT).

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